I’m not usually one for personal anecdotes but what I heard yesterday was so perfect an insight into the minds of women, I had to share. 2-3 months ago I picked up a woman with 2 little kids looking for a house. I never did get the whole story, but she was in the middle of divorcing her husband even though she was 43 with a 6-year-old son and a new baby. So long story short, we find a house, she gets ger money and we go to settlement yesterday. She brings along her best friend of 25 years. During a lull in the proceedings it comes up that the best friend is married with three stepchildren and the two of them start falling all over themselves to tell me the “amazing love story! I won’t believe it, its SO beautiful!
Apparently, this woman had a boyfriend in and after high school, they were “so in love” and “so perfect for each other” that he wanted to marry her. She being “too young” (too attractive and still receiving a lot of male attention) wasn’t “ready to get married”. They go their separate ways–MARRY other people and live their lives. Meanwhile, many years go by and the woman’s sister finds the man on, yes, you guessed it, Facebook. She finds out his wife has died. At this point their faces are glowing as they tell me excitedly “so they found each other and got back together after all that time and they are more in love than ever!!!”. So I asked her, and you were still married. She ignored it, they went on a little more with the story–so I tried again, wait, I’m confused, you were still married? Simultaneously, the woman answered “yes, but we had no kids”(looking down)and the friend said “his wife was dead!” (positive, upbeat, excited).
Obviously I didn’t press it because I was just there to get a check, but the window into an alien mind I received at that table was priceless. In that final line you can see exactly the mental process by which this women made it OK to discard her own husband for this other man. That the woman didn’t even attempt to make her husband out as abusive or bad indicated to me he was perfectly fine, just guilty of not being that other man. THIS is a woman’s idea of a beautiful love story?
She probably broke the original man’s heart when he asked her to marry him the first time, which she utterly glossed over, then she simply dropped the other man like a hot potato for him when he cropped up again and why was it ok? Because they “didn’t have KIDS”. It was ALSO ok because “his WIFE was dead”. It was like there was a chyron scroll running at the bottom of the “screen” of the story I was watching unfold that said “No Women or Children were harmed during the creation of this Love Story”. That is how marriage is defined today, solely by how it benefits women and children with absolutely no regard for the wants and needs of men. The men in this story were literally chess pieces in this woman’s life. At no point was their an indication they had interior lives of their own, they existed solely as objects in her universe.
Try to imagine, if you will, two men telling someone a “beautiful love story” about how one man dumps his wife for an old flame? I’ll wait til you stop laughing…